the simple minded suburbanite


The Roof, The Roof, The Roof is on Fire…
October 27, 2010, 1:13 pm
Filed under: authenticity, suburban, suburbs | Tags: ,

It’s election season.  What?  No shit? Sorry to break it to ya.  Well, this year is a first for me.  I am personally acquainted with a candidate.  My good friend ‘s(whom I adore) husband ( who drives me insane) is running for public office. And, since he is down the street from me, there is, of course, much discussion about him and his candidacy.

“Have you seen his roof?!” one neighbor exclaimed.  “Huh?” I answered.  “His roof!  He has at least a dozen shingles falling off of it, not to mention a rotting peice of wood over the garage.  How can I vote for someone who can’t even maintain his own home?”

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I think there are a number of reasons not to cast a vote for this man.  I’ve heard him clearly articulate racial slurs.  He has bashed gays in my presence on numerous occasions.  And, the man has been out of work for two years, barely lifting a finger (according to his wife who sat weeping on my sofa) to find one, feeling that he was talented enough that someone would come to him (so, he probably will make a great politician).

But, don’t vote for him because his home lacks a little polish?  I must have heard her wrong until, at another gathering yet another woman repeated the same reasoning adding, “And he has a see-saw and tether ball game in his front yard!”

Seriously people.  This man’s roof may be sliding off.  His personal roof may even be on fire, but, I am really questioning your foundation…

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